Life

“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you”~Maya Angelou

I’ve tried blogging before in the past. Well, it was more like I had great intentions, but I never got past the creation part for one reason or another. I’ve never known what to write about, never had the confidence in myself to share myself in this way, and never gave my thoughts a lick of value in another person’s eyes.

So what’s changed in my life that I feel I can do this? A lot actually.

Back in August, I started doing some soul-searching. I felt like I was spiraling down the drain with no way to keep myself from ending up in the septic tank. I started thinking about why I was feeling this way. Why did I hate myself and doubt my worth? Why did I feel that no one could ever love me?

My days were spent feeling overly anxious and stressed. I couldn’t fall asleep when I needed to and slept too much when I should have been living life. Reading didn’t hold my interest anymore, which was the big sign that I needed to get help. Reading was always my escape, and when the escape didn’t work anymore, that’s a problem.

On my 30th birthday in October, I requested an antidepressant prescription from my doctor. It was honestly the last thing I wanted to do since I had weaned myself off Cymbalta about 7 years ago, but I was honestly desperate for some help. The day after, I scheduled an appointment with a therapist (courtesy of my employer’s Employee Assistance Program) to begin talking through my issues.

I was terrified of seeing a professional. What could a professional do for me that a friend or loved one couldn’t? It turns out that our friends and loved ones are too close to the picture to give an unbiased perspective. I only did 6 sessions (that’s all I had for free with my current issue), but those sessions started me on a life-changing journey. Am I where I want to be yet? Not even close. But, I know where I am heading and what I need to do to get there.

So here I am, 8 months later, trying this blog thing again. Before, I wasn’t quite ready to share myself. I am jumping on the bandwagon after seeing a few of my Women’s Group/Book Club friends starting their own blogs. I felt inspired and wanted to pick up writing again. I also want to practice writing book reviews so that I can share my love of books!

So, what I will write about?
– Book reviews
– Life struggles
– Positive motivation
– Random musings
– And maybe some creative writing if I’m feeling brave πŸ™‚

Until we meet again! Happy Wednesday friends!

books stack old antique
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

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